**Reposted from June 30, 2009. With the movie out, I thought I’d repost. No decorating today. Just some thoughts on the Twilight Series. I HAVE read all 4 books and plan to see the movie tomorrow night with my sisters. Can’t wait!!!**
The burning in my chest flared agonizingly. There had to be some way to quench it. The pain was growing more and more intolerable by the second. I glared at the cliffs and the crashing waves. Well, why not? Why not quench it right now? (p. 356-357) New Moon by Stephenie Meyer
I have just finished two out of the four books in the Twilight Series and am anxious to complete the last two. I had an intense curiosity about what in the world was drawing mothers AND daughters alike to this sci-fi series. Now I know. If I were a Women’s Studies candidate, I would no doubt write my dissertation on these books! They are packed full with complex issues regarding a woman’s heart. Some of my chapter titles would be, “Daddy Issues,” “Lies Women Tell Themselves,” “Codependency,” “Romantic Love the Ultimate Idol”, “Fear of Abandonment Deemed Worse than Death,” “Imago Therapy Played Out with Bella”. I seriously could go on and on here.
For those of you unfamiliar with the books, or movie, or lunch box paraphernalia (seriously, are you living under a rock or something???), the protagonist of the film is a teenage girl who falls in love with a vampire who is constantly fighting the urge to eat her, and then in his absence she finds solace in the arms of another guy who she later finds out is a werewolf. Talk about repeating dysfunctional patterns in relationships? This girl really knows how to pick them. Now before I slam these books too severely, you should know that I’ve found myself caught up in the “romance” no matter how glaringly sick and dysfunctional it is. I’ve almost been mad at myself for wanting Bella (Beauty and the Beast anyone?) to be with these monsters. Why? Why is it that I can so glaringly see the illness and insanity before me, and yet I’m still greedy to see them kiss? These are some of the questions I’ll be exploring with you in some future posts, and I’d LOVE to hear your feedback as well.
I chose to start off our discussion with the above quote because I literally cried at this point in the book. Bella has been in mourning over a broken heart for months and finds that through reckless behavior she feels more alive. The description of Bella jumping off a cliff and nearly drowning plucked a chord in my heart. I had to give pause and annalyze why in the world I was crying! When I’m honest with myself, I too have felt so desperate to escape the grief and pain caused by a relationship that I wanted to do something reckless just to feel something, anything, else. Of course, like most of us, I never would have acted on it, but how sad that we allow ourselves to sink to these places. How sad that in our darkest moments we have such little faith in ourselves, in the change of our circumstances, and ultimately such little faith in God.
Oh yes, I have wanted to jump off something high and escape the pain of today. But I also know that any temporary escape…be it food, drink, sex, television, internet, emotional affair, cliff jumping cannot fulfill the hole in your heart. That hole can only be filled by God…and the scary thing is that God isn’t safe. There is no guarantee that with Him you won’t get hurt. One of my favorite C.S. Lewis quotes comes from The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe speaking of Aslan the Christ figure, “Safe? Who said anything about safe? ‘Course he isn’t safe. But he’s good. He’s the King, I tell you.”
No my sisters, God isn’t safe. You won’t be protected from experiencing the evils and the pain in this world. But God is good, and you can bet your life on Him. He wants to be the One you turn to when you are grieving. He wants to be the One to mend your brokenness and heal your dysfunction. He wants to be the One you Cliff Jump to. It’s scary…this whole trusting God thing, and at times it feels every bit as thrilling, exhilarating and terrifying as free falling.
I’ll talk more about submitting to God and uncovering lies of the heart in some future posts. For now, I’ll leave you with this to ponder. If you are hurting and are trying to escape that hurt through ______ (pick your poison), what would it take for you to give that idol over to God? What would it look like to be free of it? What lies would you need to let go of? (i.e. This really isn’t that bad. This is what I need to do to cope. I could give this/him up if I had to. I couldn’t live without it/him. I’d rather die than_____.)
On a comic note, if I am ever tempted in the future to jump off a cliff , I can just remind myself of the time I once DID jump off a cliff in Eleuthera, Bahamas. Let’s just say some bowling words were used and it didn’t go so well. I had bruises on my backside and down the backs of my legs for weeks. My college friends sang, “Baby’s got back…..bruises” (yes, Sir Mix-a-Lot for those of you in my generation) long after those bruises had healed. Cliff jumping is not a smart thing to do. Not smart at all….
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Wow your post was very thought provoking. If you only knew how much your words mean to me. The whole letting go and giving it up to God.
But on a vampire note: I love "True Blood"! A little more racy than Twilight though.
Great post, Beth! I too am a huge Twilight fan. I breezed through the books last year and was standing in the insanely long line to see New Moon on opening night last week, and it begs the question "why?" What is it about these books that draws us into this story?
I think you've nailed it on the head in so many aspects. As a follower of Christ, I agree that at the core of Bella's self destructive tendancies is the result of a much deeper emptiness, and I think that's what draws us in. We all can relate to her character at some point in our lives. Her need to be loved is so great, that when Edward leaves her, it's like you can almost feel her pain. Her emotions – the ups and downs – leave me conflicted between not being so crazy about her character and yet empathic because she is so misguided, and I know what that kind of heartache feels like. At the end of the day, once again love wins, which makes us all happy. It's too bad, though, that she wasn't introduced to the ultimate LOVE in Christ. Again, fantastic post!! 🙂
"How sad that we allow ourselves to sink to these places. How sad that in our darkest moments we have such little faith in ourselves, in the change of our circumstances, and ultimately such little faith in God." Profound and true!
God is more interested in building our character, than in providing us a comfy, trouble-free life.
Have a great time at the movie! I loved it 🙂
XOOX
Jen
This is one of my favorite posts of yours!
I am going to see the movie tonight! I am so excited!!
Loved this post! Beautifully written and definitely worth repeating.
XO*Tricia
P.S. Have fun with your sisters at the movie. I saw it last Friday. (Yeah, I'm that grown woman 😉
Loved this post! Beautifully written and definitely worth repeating.
XO*Tricia
P.S. Have fun with your sisters at the movie. I saw it last Friday. (Yeah, I'm that grown woman 😉
Who cares if no one else says "second off"–I love the idea and I think you should say it. If we ever get together we can say it to each other and it will be like our personal joke. Love it.
And now "New Moon." Saw it yesterday, and I must say that I thought the 3rd and 4th books were better. Bella REALLY got on my nerves in the 2nd book, but you're right. I remember those days, and we've all been there. You feel like you literally can't breathe. Like life won't go on. No one will ever love you again. And then one day you wake up and he/she isn't the first thing on your mind anymore. And then the healing begins. Oh, that vicious cycle!!
Let me know what you thought about the movie. I did think it was very true to the book.
Thank you for such a beautiful post! It is all about letting go and letting God! Taking the leap of faith! I hope you have a great Thanksgiving.
BTW..I am so addicted to the whole Twilight thing now that I saw New Moon. I can't wait to get the books to read. Enjoy the movie with your sisters.
Have fun with the next two! I have mixed feelings..
My heart flutters at just the mention of New Moon. I took the day off of work on Friday to go see it, and it was totally worth it. I'm a movie fan, so I purposely didn't read the book. From what I've heard, the movie is even better! That doesn't happen often. Let me know what you think after you've seen it!
so glad that you reposted this – I actually thought of this as I went to see the movie! I went with my neighbor and it was hard to take too seriously but we enjoyed it. I was Team Edward but after seeing the movie I think that I might have changed my mind!